#Except with the help of very important nazi assholes

[toubledrouble]

My country, Czech Republic, has third reich Protectorate centered series with a lesbian couple and honestly it's driving me insane with all the plot twist and complications and the rising antisemitism I am forced to witness but I'm staying for the historical lesbian representation

I'm sorry but I love vintage lesbians so much idgaf that you think media is oversaturated by lesbian period dramas I for one think we need MORE lesbian period dramas- 1950s lesbians, 20s flapper girl lesbians, post war lesbians, Victorian lesbians, rriot girl lesbians, butch perfomers in gay bars lesbians I WANT

[talesfromsiteredacted]

Confessions Of a Type Green: Or, Just Your Friendly Neighborhood Bixby

Not a lot is known about the average reality bender, we know they can and often do fuck up reality, but no one really knows what life is like for one. Do Type Greens put on their socks one at a time, sort of stuff. Lucky for you reading this, there just happens to be one available for commentary. For the record, I can't speak for other Bixbies, but I still do one at a time. Surprise, your average reality bender is a lot like everybody else.

I still need an alarm clock to wake up. I still need to eat, sleep, drink, and relax like a normal person. In fact, a lot of benders just... do things the normal way most of the time. A type green raised with a loving family to provide a strong moral compass avoid using their powers at all, except when not doing so will get them killed or worse. A lot of it is instinctive, there's no Unseen University for this stuff. Thus, our "gifts" tend to be unpredictable. But, with careful training, we can become pretty good with control. It's a bit like riding a bicycle, the more you do it, the easier it becomes. But, much like riding a bicycle, it's important to do things safely.

Establishing boundaries early on in any relationship is important, so it's best to pick a few basic guidelines. Like, try not to kill anyone on accident or reflex. No using your abilities too quickly either, so build up to moving the mountain. No time travel, it never ends the way intended. Also, no warping people. No matter how much you'd like a certain coworker to forget a certain sea shanty. Do not call attention to yourself, just in case someone suspects what you are. So, as awesome as it might sound... no superhero suits. The Foundation boys are rough, but the GOC (much like Wu-Tang Clan) ain't nothing you want to fuck with.

Also, be very careful whom you tell anything to. People talk all the time, and especially about the weird shit they see. Why do y'all think Clef lies like a bad toupee all the time?

Now, onto the really boring, practical stuff (yes we HAVE to do things like this, unless you want to be unalived by a 50 caliber to the head). Tip one, hunger, thirst, exhaustion, even a common cold can mess with your powers. So, take care of yourself. No matter how small or grand, using your powers can and does take it out of you, especially at first. Stay fed, stay hydrated (yes coffee counts, but water is still a better option), get good sleep, and... chill. Bad self care does not directly kill, but it will suck if not done properly. Only a vacuum likes to suck.

Two, if you must alter your reality... think long and hard about unintended consequences. Clef did after the 2020 election. Big oops is right, Boss. No one wants to deal with Nazi Necromorphs because you ran late, decided to keep that traffic light green for just three more seconds, and almost get slammed by a guy in a self-driving electric car whose car did not know to stop. Yes, I exaggerate, but only to show the level of WTF that can go wrong here.

Three: as tempted as you might be, helping your friends out of every bad situation is a bad call. There's too much downside potential for it to go horribly wrong. If you cannot resist the urge to help, stick to plausible stuff. Like, say... your pal Ed owes this jerk a grand in cash, he's $100 short... and finds a c note in the jacket he borrowed off you, or just floating in the wind. That's relatively harmless. Or your grandmother finds the exact piece of carnival glass she missed out on at the church rummage sale for $1 or such. Little things.

Lastly for now, just try and not be an asshole. This world has too many as is. Be kind, be careful, don't overextend yourself. That being said, goodnight and good luck, fellow greens.

[aggressive-positivity-network]

Tf2 headcanons? Aw yeah! So let's say a new merc joins the team. They're a total asshole: Cocky, sarcastic, overconfident, refuse help. But both Spy and Scout see right through that, it's a defense mechanism. How do they go about making this person comfortable enough to not be an asshole?

*chanting* HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMFORT HURT COMF

Okay, jokes aside, this is one of my favorite tropes. Maybe I’m too naïve to believe that some people are just mean to be mean, or maybe it’s a sort of comfort to know that even the worst people can be understood, but either way, WOOOOOOOOO!

*****************

An Ass For An Ass

Headcanons

Scout:

To be honest, Scout’s threshold for asshole-ery is pretty high. Growing up with eight brothers will do that to you.

But when the new recruit came around, something immediately rubbed him the wrong way.

Recruit always stole his thunder with the crass jokes and over-the-top displays. Every battle turned into a competition, which messed with Scout’s system of fighting. He never had to focus much on his own team before, and now he had to worry about keeping his own reputation upheld while trying not to get stabbed, shot, or blown up.

Recruit also kept hitting on Miss Pauling - even after reminding them again and again that she was lesbian, and was not and never will be into dudes.

“Come on…you just haven’t been with a real man yet…”

“No, no, I’ve been with a lot of men. Real men. I just wasn’t into any of them. After a while, it was kind of obvious.”

But what really pissed a lot of people off was Recruit’s fighting style.

They were an absolute monster on the field - that’s why they were chosen - but every interaction was treated as some sort of survival scenario.

One would think that would be a good thing, but Recruit was ridiculous.

No matter what the situation was, he was fine, he was okay, he could take it, he could fix it.

He could be killed only inches away from a Medic because he would never yell for one. Sometimes Recruit would even show visible anger at being healed. It got to the point where Medic didn’t heal him at all, and just allowed him to die as to not waste time he could give too more grateful patients.

Missions were even worse.

He followed orders to a T, but Pauling had to beg him to leave a failed mission, or to leave without completely destroying the site.

Everyone just took it as Recruit showing off, or having something to prove as a rookie.

It was annoying, but ultimately harmless in most circumstances.

However, it all came to a head when Recruit tried disengage a sentry by himself and was severely injured.

Both Engineer and Medic, who had had to fix most of Recruit’s past and current recklessness, ripped him a new one, one chewing out after the other.

“What we’re you thinkin’, son?! One crossed wire and you woulda blown the whole base!”

“Zhe only reason you are allowed in my lab at all is because it’s in my contract. Personally, I vould have rather left nature to it…”

Since then, Recruit did exactly as he was told, and nothing else. And most of the team liked it that way.

But Scout recognized some warning signs immediately. Fatigue, near silence except for missions, self-isolation, snapping when people got too close…it all paved the way for a pretty nasty (and, for Scout, very familiar) result.

One night, Recruit was sitting on the balcony, and Scout came out with two bottles - a beer for Recruit and a root beer for himself.

(Scout can only drink on the weekends because one, unlike most, he can’t go to work hung over because his job requires a lot of movement, and two, he has no restraint and can’t stop once he starts.)

“What do you want?”

Scout shrugged. “Depends.”

“On what?!”

“What are ya willin’ to tell me?”

Recruit just looked at the beer and sneered.

“Can’t we just skip this?” Scout said. “Maybe get to the part where you tell me what kinda Sally Sob Story we’re dealin’ with here?”

Recruit looked away.

“Aw, c’mon, don’t tell me you don’t got one. ‘Cause you do. I can see it a mile away. So what happened? Pop leave? Somebody died? Lotta brothers and sisters? Ma had a few too many and smacked ya around?”

Recruit didn’t turn around, but Scout could tell he was crying. He had hit a sore spot. Hard.

“Hey, pal, listen…”

Scout trailed off, then slowly began again.

“…the only reason I know is ‘cause I’ve been through it, ‘kay? Outta everybody I knew, I only trusted me. And that was great when I did a good job, ‘cause I knew I put me there.”

Scout opened his bottle of root beer and took a long swig.

“But when I screwed somethin’ up, it’s like everybody I ever knew just let me down. The one thing I could count on was gone.”

Recruit looked at Scout with tears in his eyes.

“But ya can’t do everything by yourself,” Scout continued. “Believe me. I learned that the hard way.”

Scout laughed, but it was mostly to clear the air. He didn’t get serious very often.

Recruit hadn’t touched his beer, but was leaned over the balcony with his head in his hands.

Scout sighed and looked up at the stars.

“But here’s somethin’ that nobody told me - it gets easier, y’know that? You just gotta relax and cut yourself some slack.”

Recruit shifted uncomfortably. “But the Administrator said…”

“Yeah yeah yeah, I know what she said. Gave ya that whole speech about how bein’ part of the team means discipline and focus and whatever. It’s all bull crap. She don’t know the first thing about bein’ on the field. If she did, why’d she hire us?”

“Sh-she said my perseverance was an asset to the team.”

“Perseverance, my ass. You know what would be an asset to the team? Stayin’ alive for more than fifteen minutes!”

Recruit looked at his feet. He had blinked away his tears, but he still looked on the verge of falling apart.

Scout put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it a little.

“You’re a great fighter, Recruit. You’re one of the best…that’s why you’re here. You got nothin’ to prove to nobody. Not to me, not to the team, not to the Administrator…not even to yourself. You’ve made it, kid. You’ve made it.”

Scout slid his hand off Recruit and started to walk away.

“Hey.”

Scout turned to see Recruit in the process of opening his beer.

“Thanks.”

Scout smiled. “No problem, pal. Plenty more under Demo’s mattress.”

“No, I mean…for that. I needed that tonight.”

“Oh…yeah! Sure. Don’t worry about it.”

Scout went back inside and to his room - but not before checking the cameras on the balcony a few times. Just in case.

Over the next few months, Scout kept helping Recruit break some old bad habits.

Recruit learned to take criticism without getting angry, to leave tanked missions, and to take care of himself.

He still occasionally flirted with Miss Pauling, but it was now more of an inside joke than anything.

Recruit still isn’t perfect - he still cringes a little when he’s healed, and falls back into survival mode when times are stressful - but he is now a much happier, much healthier person.

Spy:

Spy’s asshole wasn’t a merc, per se.

They were more of an informant, usually giving out important facts about locations, missions, and a target’s history.

Sometimes they would even use the Administrator’s PA system to announce new rules and reminders.

This would be perfectly fine - after all, you get kind of tired of hearing the Administrator all the time - except for the fact that Informant was the most sarcastic, most nasally, most apathetic, most matter-of-fact person on earth.

Even outside of a work setting, which was rare because they stayed in their office most of the time, Informant would go out of their way to be as condescending as possible.

Especially to whoever they considered to be in the “less intelligent” category: Heavy, Pyro, Scout, Demo, and Soldier.

To all the “others,” he turned every briefing into a contest to see who knew more at any given time…which, of course, usually meant he won.

“Now, does anyone know where his address is? Come on, any takers? Yeah, I thought so.”

Unlike Recruit, which would only warrant a few grumbles here and there from the team, Informant was the subject of a lot of hissed complaints and terrible rants from even the calmest of members.

Informant was the only one who could get under Heavy’s skin - a personal pet peeve of his was being considered less intelligent or less of a human being because English wasn’t his first language, which Informant chose to remind him of constantly.

It began with a few simple jabs at his grammar or word structure, but once Informant figured out that Heavy wouldn’t hurt a fly outside of battle, the taunts grew more and more daring.

Heavy would usually ignore Informant, which would only exacerbate their need to be noticed. This led to some pretty nasty interactions - from spouting the statistics of Russia’s average intelligence to even saying Heavy was a disgrace to his country by being a literature major.

“How’s that Russian literature major treating you? You know - in America.”

Sniper and Medic had tried to set Informant straight, but Heavy refused to accept any help. This was something that was his to bear, and his alone. He knew that they both took their own helping of harassment.

But one day, Informant went a little to far.

He did the one thing you should never do: insult Heavy’s family.

“You mother and sisters can’t do anything more than wait for you. No wonder you’re the only source of income.”

Before he knew it, Informant was against a wall, struggling to breathe, blood running into his eyes.

Heavy walked away after the incident, and told Medic about it, but he refused to heal him. Informant had called Medic a Nazi on more than one occasion.

This, finally, is where Spy comes in.

Spy was walking by Informant’s office, when he heard a strange sound - barely suppressed hiccups and sobs.

Despite his aversion to displays of emotion, the promise of seeing one of his greatest enemies as their lowest was too amusing to resist.

He knocked lightly on the door, then slowly opened it - always the master of drama.

Informant was under their desk, bloodied and bruised, sobbing into their knees.

Spy entered noiselessly, sitting in Informant’s office chair and lighting a cigarette.

It was only when Spy made a dramatic exhale of the smoke that Informant looked up, tears streaking their face.

They stared at each other for a moment, and then Spy finally spoke.

“Oh, how the mighty fall. Flown too close to the sun, have we?”

Informant couldn’t do much more than snivel and retreat farther below the desk.

“Who did it?” Spy asked. “I want to give them my regards…and maybe a bottle of wine.”

“H-Heavy…”

“Oh? Well, if anyone can bring him to blows, it’s you.”

Spy put his feet on the desk and continued to blow smoke out of his nose, thinking.

“It’s strange,” he said. “Most offices have at least a few pictures of family. A trip to the beach, perhaps the zoo…?”

He took a quick glance around.

“No children. No army mates. No graduation photos or a large catch at a local lake. The only personal item you have is this…”

Spy picked up a Rubik’s Cube. The plastic still around it crinkled.

“Unused.”

Informant looked at the floor.

“I like to keep my personal and professional life separate.”

Spy pursed his lips and squinted.

“How noble of you. But I don’t think that’s the case. You know what I think, Informant?”

Spy took his feet of the desk and bent down, looking Informant in the eyes.

“I don’t think you have a life.”

Informant’s eyes went wide for a moment, then his face immediately crumpled. Bullseye.

Spy smirked and got up from the chair, starting to leave.

Informant’s sniffling turned into sobbing, and before Spy could put his hand on the doorknob, muffled wailing filled the office.

Spy closed his eyes and clenched his teeth. He was trying not to remember something. But the imagery was too strong.

He remembered hiding under a table, like Informant was. People screaming and cursing at each other in French. His knees all scarred and his nose runny from a cold that should have resolved weeks ago. Waltz music coming from next door, trying to drown out the fighting. Glass breaking. Biting his knuckles so he wouldn’t whimper or cry.

Spy’s hand closed into fist. He took a deep breath, and turned to face Informant again.

“But to be fair…”

He walked towards the desk, putting his hand in his suit pocket. He got on his knees and pulled out a pink handkerchief.

“…I don’t have one either.”

He offered the handkerchief to Informant, who put it to his face, still staring at Spy through red eyes.

The pair were silent for a moment, with Spy putting out his cigarette and lighting a new one while Informant cleaned themselves up.

“But the difference between you and I,” Spy said, his voice wavering a bit, “is that I am a Spy. If my information got into the wrong hands, it could be the end of me and my team.”

He tapped his cigarette on a nearby trash can, letting the ashes fall into it.

“But what are you hiding from?”

Informant took a shaky inhale, the handkerchief still covering his nose and mouth.

“W-what?”

“Why do you feel the need to be, as Scout puts it, a tier five jerkazoid?”

Informant sniffled. “I…I didn’t think I took it that far.”

“Took what that far?”

“I just…snrk…I thought that’s what I had to do to get them to take me seriously.”

Informant laughed, but their heart wasn’t in it.

“I’m five foot four with red hair and freckles. I look more like someone’s Andy doll than a contract killer. I thought maybe if I knew everything…I’d be worth it.”

They shrugged.

“At best, they’d be impressed. At worst, they would never get close enough to me to know the truth: the only reason why I’m here is because I can rattle off a few names and that I had good grades in school because I had nothing better to do.”

Spy’s chest ached. He didn’t know why, but it was a strange feeling to him.

“Mon ami…”

He cleared his throat.

“If half of the team is any indication, you don’t need to be Nikola Tesla to be hired. Hell, the fact you can read is an anomaly in itself. But there is something you must understand…”

Spy cleared his throat again. His voice had gotten quite unstable all of a sudden.

“Intelligence is measured in different ways. Scout could never read even the simplest of children’s books, but his physical intelligence - reflexes, spatial awareness, aim - is phenomenal. Medic would have to put my spine back together if I even attempted to do what he does on the field.”

Informant snickered at the joke, or perhaps the image it conjured.

“And me,” Spy continued. “I can speak almost any language, adjust to any social setting, charm anyone, fool anyone…kill anyone. Just like you, I can remember, and I use the information I absorb mostly to show how superior I am to all my lowly colleagues.”

Spy furrowed his brow and looked away.

“But I know less about myself than even my enemies. I have hidden it so deep within my mind that I can hardly remember…or perhaps would rather not remember…who I was before this mask of mine.”

Informant hesitated. “I…I’m sorry, Spy.”

Spy sneered and puffed a few smoke rings.

“I don’t want your sympathy. I want you to have some self-respect - and respect for my teammates. Because next time you are beaten within an inch of your life, you might catch me in a less generous mood.”

With that, Spy got up, reached into his suit pocket and presented a small MediKit, which he tossed to Informant.

“I’d suggest freshening up before going to any more briefings.”

Informant nodded, and set to work healing himself.

Spy started to leave, then stuck his head back in.

“And hang a few posters, would you? Your office looks like a prison cell.”

Finally, the Frenchman took his leave, adjusting his suit and nodding solemnly to the team members he happened to pass - or scowling at them, depending.

He glanced over the security feed, and once he was satisfied, made his way to his smoking room.

Spy closed the heavy oak door, poured himself a small glass of scotch, and sat down in his chair next to the fireplace.

He put a magazine on his knee and began to flip through the pages, but his gaze soon started to wander.

He closed the magazine, tossed it into the fire, leaned into his hand, and wept.

…So what became of Informant?

Well, after a reluctant heal from Medic and a few well-deserved apologies, Informant began to try and break the cycle of self-sabotage.

The process took a lot longer than Recruit’s did - especially since Informant’s transgressions were a lot more egregious - but, little by little, they began to heal.

A lot of the time, the other mercs would have to tell them to tone it down a bit, or to cut him off completely if necessary.

Informant still almost has a panic attack if he doesn’t have the right papers, and his office is still pretty bare, but he took Spy’s advice - a few AC/DC posters hang on the leftmost wall.

As for Spy, well…he needs to have a talk with Medic.

******************

I am so sorry…this is all so messy and weird. One is so much longer than the other, and I’m not even sure half the dialogue sounds right.

The two headcanons were just typed out at different times, the first where I had less motivation and the second when I had more motivation. This wasn’t on purpose, it just happened.

I hope you still like it, though!

[samisadeangirl]

You as well as I know very well that “woke” is just the latest dog whistle that people use when they really mean anything that isn’t straight and white. I agree that it is a far cry from being a n*zi and that list is absolutely wrong, defending conservatism by claiming reverse racism is ignorant and you really should do better. Don’t sell your soul for this fandom because as a whole, it treats POC like we’re not here. Hellers are awful miserable people but the rest of fandom really is just making it easier for them to claim bigotry with constant complaints of wokeness because let’s be honest. We know what they mean when they say it.

Hey Asshole Anon,

That may be your OPINION, but when I use "woke" (specifically with the dick-quotes), I'm referring to SJWs who make a big deal about supposedly caring about legit issues without doing anything substantive just to get online brownie points and/or due to an agenda--and I'm sure there are plenty of others who have similar opinions as well. Others who complain about "wokeness" don't like the PC trend of including women, POC, queers, etc. simply to check off boxes and/or of cancelling anyone who doesn't agree with them. YOUR assumption that it's because they're racist, homophobic, misogynistic, etc. is precisely what gives wokeness a bad name.

As for some of your other "points," being conservative isn't a bad thing and certainly isn't the same as being bigoted. People are conservative for any number of reasons, and that doesn't make them terrible people. I'm a progressive liberal and disagree with conservatives on just about everything, but I'm not going to lump them all in with diehard Trumpers, Nazis, white supremacists, and other bigots.

Sorry to burst your bubble, but reverse racism does exist. It obviously isn't a systemic problem like racism against POC, but we can't deny that there are POC who hate white people simply for their race, who blame whites as a group for various problems, and so on. Hate of ANY kind, whether toward a minority or group in power, is still wrong and doesn't help anyone.

As for the SPN fandom, you SJWs seem to miss the entire point, which is that this fandom is supposed to be about enjoying the show, not promoting social or political issues. SPN has never pretended to be about anything other than two cishet white males fighting monsters and saving the world. Complaints about SPN killing minorities are specious because it's a horror show that killed EVERYONE, including far more cishet white males than anyone else, and no character died due to their minority status. Sure, they did things early on that are pretty cringey now (like Dean calling Sam gay as an insult), but the show evolved with the times and got better. I agree that it would've been nice if there'd been more diversity in the major secondary characters, but in SPN's defense with the exception of Jack none of those characters (i.e. Bobby, Castiel, Crowley) were planned to be as important as they became (no excuse for Jack being another white dude though). SPN did however have plenty of women, POC, and/or queer characters who were important and/or powerful, including Chuck, Raphael, AU!Michael, Naomi, Crowley, Lilith, Abbadon, Dagon, Ellen, Jo, Rufus, Kevin, Charlie, Jody, Donna, Claire, Kaia, Patience, Max and Alicia Banes, and many more.

If you truly want to see social justice, then maybe look elsewhere than a genre show on a smaller network that never claimed to be trying to make any statements. And maybe stop accusing fans who are trying to enjoy said show and who may be minorities themselves of bigotry.

[duhragonball]

Battle Tendency Liveblog: JJBA Ch. 63-64

Let’s do a short one.    This is just the chapter where Joseph meets Caesar, and the chapter where the Pillar Men wake up.   Curiously, these two moments have something in common, which is butts.    You have been warned.

Okay, so last time, Joseph went to Rome to meet a mysterious ally, who turned out to be Caesar Zeppeli.   Speedwagon had planned to introduce them, but Caesar wanted to take Joseph’s measure, so he watched him at lunch, and when he saw how pitiful his Hamon technique was, he was quickly soured on the idea of teaming up. 

Also, Caesar’s grandfather, Will A. Zeppeli, was the one who trained Joseph’s grandfather in Part 1.    Will sacrificed himself to help Jonathan Joestar master the Ripple, and Jonathan died anyway, so maybe the Joestars aren’t so hot after all.    Will’s son and grandson have dedicated their lives to following in his footsteps, while Joseph knows practically nothing about his grandfather.   In his defense, though, Speedwagon purposely hid that information from Joseph, probably at Erina’s request.  

So that’s enough to piss of Joseph, who took an immediate dislike to Caesar for being snobby and self-important.   Also, Caesar really lays it on thick when he’s hitting on women, which is always.   Joseph wants a fight, but Caesar says that Joseph can’t even beat the girl he’s been hitting on during this conversation.   Joseph replies that Caesar couldn’t defeat a pigeon.

So Caesar sends the girl to kick Joseph’s ass for him, and I guess he used Hamon to control her?   I don’t really get how Hamon works sometimes, especially with living things.   Sometimes it’s like “I used Hamon to make this alligator run into my neighbor’s kitchen to microwave me a Hot Pocket!”  and how exactly does that happen?   Does the alligator suddenly know what to do?  Or is the alligator being manipulated like a puppet, which the Hamon user has to control through each step?   Anyway, this lady beats the fuck out of Joseph and Araki throws in an upskirt shot for no particular reason.   It looked to me like she wasn’t wearing any underwear, but now it sort of looks more like brown cloth than shadow.   Then again, that could just be the decision of the colorist.    Butt #1.

Anyway, this sets up Joseph for a demonstration of Caesar’s secret weapon to defeat the Pillar Men, the Bubble Launcher.   He keeps vials of soapy water on his clothes at all times, so that he can make bubbles and charge them with Hamon energy.   In this case, he sets it up so that Joseph gets trapped in one giant bubble.   I guess it’s impenetrable?   Also Joseph will use up the air in there, preventing him from calling upon his own Ripple to escape.

Except Joseph planned ahead, and rigged that pigeon he was talking about earlier.   He charged it with his Hamon, and stuck it inside the lady’s mouth while she was kicking his ass.   Joseph knew Caesar would have to free her from his control at some point, and when she did, he would get a face-full of Ripple-charged pigeon.   This knocks him into the bubble, freeing Joseph.

I’d just like to say that I don’t like Caesar very much.   Laying it on too thick with the ladies is one thing, but using them to fight his battles is another.    The bubble gimmick is kind of corny too.   And sure, there’s a lot of things to criticize about Joseph Joestar, but somehow Caesar always manages to aim for the wrong things, like his ignorance of Part 1 lore, which isn’t his fault. 

This isn’t to say that he detracts from my enjoyment of Part 2.   Far from it, I think he’s a good foil for Joseph.    But I see people shipping him with Joseph, or wishing he could have joined the Stardust Crusaders in Part 3, and I’m like, why would Joseph want to hang around that asshole any more than he has to?   Caesar’s kind of a dick.   

Elsewhere, the Nazis are keeping watch over a catacomb deep beneath the Roman Colosseum.    This is one of those things that ties Part 2 with Part 5.   They’re two of the JoJo parts that are most isolated from the others, and they’re not closely related to one another, except that both have scenes in Rome.   The Colosseum set up the final battle in Vento Aureo, but 63 years earlier, it was where the Pillar Men had been lying in stasis.   

The Nazis have been keeping an assortment of UV lamps trained on the Pillar Men, although I’m not sure if they learned to do this before or after the battle with Santana.   I’m also confused about how this works.    Santana only woke up because he absorbed enough blood.   Seems like as long as no one bleeds on these Pillar Men, we should be fine, except the Aztecs prophesied that they would all wake up in 1938.   Were they simply anticipating events that were fated to happen, or was this a calculation based on how long it would take the Pillar Men to wake up on their own?   I guess what I’m asking is, if no one had interfered with the Pillar Men in 1938, no blood, no UV lamps, no human contact of any kind, would they have woken up anyway?    Are the UV lamps supposed to slow down their awakening, or is it intended to stymie them if and when they do wake up? 

Anyway, the one in the center has this circular formation on his forehead, which suddenly breaks open, revealing a deep hole.   When one of the Germans takes a closer look, a long horn lances out and stabs the dude in the face.   Then it spins like a drill, splattering blood all over the UV lamps, providing enough shade for...

Wamuu!  He emerges from the cavern wall, takes one look at the UV lamps, and declares that he can’t be defeated by such means.    Unlike Santana, who took the time to learn the language of those around him, Wamuu just speaks in Latin, because it’s the last human language he knows, and then he lets his powers do the talking.    First he fuses all the Nazis together, hand to hand in a human chain, then he pokes their commander in the forehead and drains all their innards.   You’d think he’d eat the skins too, like Santana, but maybe Wammu’s a picky eater.

Then he touches the foreheads of his comrades in the pillar and shouts “Awaken, my masters!” and the awesome theme song plays.

Unlike the anime, I’m pretty sure the Pillar Men are just letting their bare asses hang out in the comic.    Maybe they’re supposed to have thongs, and you just can’t see them because of how jacked their glutes are, but it sure looks to me like they just don’t give a fuck.    They wore loincloths in the front, and we puny mortals just have to accept that this is as far as they’re willing to accommodate us.   Butt #2.

Sometimes I’ll read this comic, or Dragon Ball, and try to imagine what influences this may have had on Western comic book artists of the same period.   Stardust Crusaders “inspired” the shortlived rip-off Diesel, but I’m talking about subtler artistic choices.    For example, the Pillar Men’s exaggerated musculature sure reminds me of some of the artwork by Batman penciller Kelly Jones.   Also, some of the closeup shots feel similar to the faces drawn by Superman artist Dan Jurgens, but this might all just be a coincidence.  I have a hard time believing everyone at DC and Marvel was sitting around reading JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure.    Maybe they should have been...

Anyway, Wamuu reports to his superiors that he overheard the Germans talking about the defeat of Santana in Mexico.  Wamuu doesn’t refer to the fourth Pillar Man by that name, since that name would have been given to him by Stroheim.   No doubt the Pillar Men called Santana something else, but we never find out what.   The other two, Esidisi and Kars, don’t particularly care about Santana anyway.   He couldn’t keep up with their abilities, which was why they left him behind in Mexico in the first place. 

No, all Kars cares about is resuming their search for the Red Stone of Aja.   Wait, is “Aja” a reference to the band “a-ha?”   The stone is a gem that, when worn in Kars’s special Stone Mask, will transform them into the ultimate life forms.    They came to Europe in the age of the Roman Empire to find the stone, but apparently something went wrong, because it’s 2000 years later, and the Roman Empire is gone and they still don’t have the stone.   But these guys have been around for a very long time, and they’re not in any great hurry.  

Meanwhile, Joseph and Caesar are doing silly poses in their hotel room, and I think Joseph broke his elbow or something...

[sergeant-donny-donowitz]

The Choice (Aldo Raine x Reader)

Requested by @inglourious-imagines

@owba-chan @war-obsessed @inglourious-imagines @tealaquinn @struggling-bee @frozenhuntress67 @kwyloz @sodapop182 @marlenemarauders

Let me know if you wanna be added to the IB or OUATIH taglists! :)

_____________________ Not so long ago, you were stationed in a base that seemed to be millions of miles from home, and what felt like millions more from the end of the war, somewhere in England. You were told that you were being considered for an elite team, but by who? To do what? Nothing else was revealed to you. You shrugged it off, not really thinking there was any substance to it. It was just a rumor, really. In fact, it seemed everyone on that base had been told the same thing. What were the odds they'd take you, you wondered. Normally, you'd be completely absorbed in wondering what the hell was going on, but you had a fun little distraction on base... His name was Donny Donowitz. You two became real close in relatively little time. Honestly, what soldiers then didn't? Time was of the essence, after all. You never knew how much of it anyone had left. He'd flirt with you, and you'd flirt with him. It never meant a thing, honestly. And he knew that. Or...he did at first. Little by little, he wondered what he'd do when one of you shipped out. What would happen if...well...something happened to you? Little by little, the things he said to you started to mean something, at least to him. Every playful wink slowly began to carry some weight. Every smile was brighter than the last. Every silly little line became less silly to him as the days went on... Even then, he knew you would never be his. A general brought him in to a special briefing. He as going to be part of an elite team...and he couldn’t bring himself to say goodbye to you. To his surprise...he didn’t have to. That became especially clear on the day he first met his new team. At first, he was unbelievably relieved that you were in it... Then it slowly became a tragedy that he dug himself in alone, knowing you truly never would love him the way he loved you. "My name is Lieutenant Aldo Raine," your new lieutenant walked over, taking his damn time. And you were lost, looking at him every single moment. The way he carried himself drew your attention in a way no one else had before.You looked at him the way that Donny looked at you. Donny noticed. And Aldo did too. He smiled subtly at the very end of his speech, glancing at you with a raised eyebrow. You glanced around at the basterds, then at Donny and Aldo. Things would work out eventually, right? ****Six Months Later****

You were all in a tavern, 'celebrating'. You'd just completed a particularly important mission. The basterds were sitting around a table, each either drinking beer, scotch, champagne, or wine. ...Except for Smitty, who sipped on some water through a straw, and it made that awkward slurping sound, though no one really noticed. They were all too entertained. Aldo and Donny were fighting, for maybe the thousandth time. And no one was more entertained than the basterd you'd just acquired in your mission: Sergeant Hugo Stiglitz.

Besides watching Donny beat nazis to death, this was one of the basterds' favorite past times. After all, if you pit a man from Tennessee against a man from Boston, you're bound to hear some of the most ....well...interesting strings of words put together. At this point, it was like listening to a radio show, maybe even a soap opera.

You, however, were not so amused. In fact, you were getting real fucking tired of it. You got up without a word, and left. The table grew uncomfortably quiet immediately after that. Donny and Aldo glared each other. "See what'cha did, Donowitz?" Aldo glared at him with narrowed, accusing eyes. "No," Donny sputtered in disbelief, "But I saw what you fucking did." Donny muttered something he was lucky Aldo didn't hear, as he made his way outside. You saw Donny coming your way and you muttered, "God fucking damn it, Donny." "What?!" "What do you mean 'what?!'" You huffed and crossed your arms, "Are you fucking kidding me?!" "Y/n..." His voice grew soft as he approached you, and reached for your hand, but you pulled away from him. "You were my best friend, ok? That was it. You know that's all I've ever seen you as. I know you're a protective guy but this is fucking ridiculous." "I just-" "No. This is getting out of fucking hand. I know you think it's cute, you think you're being protective, but I don't love you Donny." He was silent for a moment, as if your words had stolen every breath and word he had. He shook his head, not wanting to believe what he'd known for as long as he'd known you. "How do you kn-" You looked right at him. You were done with all these games. "Because I love Aldo!" You were exasperated, frustrated, and just absolutely over it. "You've known, Donny. You've always known." He looked down at the ground, wondering where he'd gone wrong. When did fun and games turn into this? If he looked at you in that moment, it would hurt too much. He'd know for sure that he'd lost you. "I didn't care so much at the begining, ok? You were just being assholes to each other. Just being basterds. But this is going too far. It's fucking embarassing, ok? I'm not yours. I'm not even Aldo's! Neither of you get to decide for me. I'm a fucking human being, and I can choose for myself, got it?" He mumbled something that sounded like he agreed. "I didn't choose you, and you know it. You and Aldo keep on like this, you're gonna get someone killed." He was silent for a moment, then nodded softly, "Ok kid," he sighed, "Ok..." He looked at you with a soft smile, and broken-hearted eyes for a moment before he walked away. He'd be fine. He was Donny Donowitz, after all. You sighed, crossed your arms, and rolled your eyes, "He's gone, Aldo." Aldo smiled as he came a little closer, "You still mad?" "You would be too." He sighed, as he slowly reached for your hand, "I'm sorry darlin'...." You sighed, trying not to smile. But then he lifted those goddamn starry eyes to look at yours, and he gave you his signature smirk, "But can ya blame us?" You couldn't help but giggle a little, as you closed your hand around his in defeat. "Alright, alright. Just...no more fighting with Donny, ok?" "But what if-" "No." "Alright, but-" "No." "Wh-" "No." Aldo laughed then, "You sure know what you want, darlin'." You smiled with a loving sigh, as you looked at him, and quietly commented, "I sure do, Aldo. I sure do..."

[styleiconoscarthegrouch]

The thing that is pissing me off the most about Ian and Mickey’s storyline is that it is so painfully unnecessary. There is plenty of material to mine from Ian and Mickey being ex-cons without any of the Paula hijinks.

Here’s how I would play out the season, still accounting for the need for comedy, without Paula. If any of this inspires you to write a fic please do! I certainly won’t.

Episodes 1 and 2 play out the way 2 and 3 did. Minus the stupid fucking nazi scene.

Episode 3 Ian gets out of prison. The episode would start with a short goodbye scene between Ian and Mickey. They both tell eachother that they’re committed to making it work, but it’s clear they’re anxious about being separated. Mickey thinks he still has several years left on his sentence and it’s unclear how much contact they’ll be allowed to have with one another, since as a parolee Ian isn’t supposed to have contact with other felons. The major story beats about the rest of the Gallagher’s not being home when he gets out play out the same way they did in episode 5. The biggest change is Paula. Instead of being crazy and corrupt, she’s just overworked and kind of an asshole. Ian ends up with some shitty menial job that is boring and kind of demoralizing (the Kash and Grab would be a nice full circle because it would emphasize the ways in which prison set his life back).

Episode 4- I think this would still be an Ian light episode and I wouldn’t include Mickey so that we could really emphasize his absence. Ian is struggling to readjust to being back in the real world. His job sucks, his family isn’t really around and on top of all of that he can’t even talk to Mickey. If the goal by the end of the season is to get them married then right now we want to be laying the foundation that Mickey is Ian’s family now, not his siblings (the same way the show is actually doing this with Tami and Lip). The point of this episode is to really emphasize that Ian needs Mickey.

Episode 5- Mickey gets out! This time he doesn’t try and brake out and we’re given an actual explanation for why Ian doesn’t pick him up- he legally can’t. We can even still get the scene of Mickey climbing in Ian’s bedroom window, but this time it’s not because he’s scared of the cartel, but because he doesn’t want his parole officer to know he’s seeing Ian. We get a longer reunion scene and a scene where they talk about the future. There’s a lot of joy because they’re both out, but Ian is really worried, they can’t legally see each other, how are they supposed to have a relationship? He’s worried it will be like when they had to hide from Terry. Mickey will reassure Ian that it will work out because it has always worked out in the past, but it’s clear to the audience he’s also a little unsure. It’s important that the audience see Ian voice his concerns about how they’re going to make it work, so that the seeds for his proposal are planted. It needs to be clear that Ian is actively looking for a solution, but it also needs to be phrased in a way that Mickey could misinterpret it, so that when they go to get married the first time we can have a big misunderstanding and brake up.

Episode 6- Secret domestic Gallavich! Mickey adjusts to being on the outside. Legally he’s living with his cousin Sandy, but he’s trying to spend as much time as he can with Ian. He gets a parole officer that is over invested and we can get the sitcom hijinks the writers want from the two of them sneaking around trying to see each other. Also some domestic cuteness. The episode ends with them getting caught by Mickey’s parole officer. They’re able to buy him off but it’s wipes out any money they had stashed, if they get caught again they’re screwed. Now we’ve raised the stakes for the audience.

Episode 7- Ian comes up with the idea to marry Mickey. There are laws that allow parolees to have contact with other felons who they are legally related to so Ian comes up with the marriage scam. Mickey is unsure about this plan (they would still need to get a judge to agree and write an exception into their respective parole agreements) but he loves Ian and agrees to go through with it.

Episode 8- Failed courthouse wedding. Ian and Mickey are getting ready to get married when Mickey gets cold feet. We finally start to deal with some of Mickey’s abandonment issues. Maybe Lip makes a joke about Ian saying “fuck no” to marrying Mickey back when he first got out of prison (this is honestly something i think the writers might do). We get a big dramatic ugly couple fight that brings up two important points, 1. Ian has left Mickey more than once when things get hard, and 2. Mickey has never had a relationship outside of Ian. If their scam marriage fails Ian still has his family, Mickey has no one else and that’s a scary prospect especially because Ian doesn’t even actually want to marry him. The episode ends with Mickey giving Ian the ring back and leaving with Sandy. Ian is heartbroken

Episode 9- This episode starts with Ian at the Gallagher house, he and Lip have been fighting because Ian blames Lip for Mickey calling off their wedding. Ian is already wearing the ring on a necklace. Because they didn’t get married (which their parole officers know about) Ian really can’t contact Mickey so he’s using Sandy as a go between. Sandy says that Mickey needs space and that Ian needs to back off. We then switch focus to Mickey. Sandy, who is out and proud, is determined to help Mickey rebound. Mickey doesn’t really want to rebound but he still feels like shit from their fight in the last episode (all the times Ian cheated and the dudes he dated after Mickey was locked up definitely came up) so she lets her make him a Grindr profile and or take him to a gay bar.

We get several very bad dates/conversations but just as it looks like all is lost we meet Vespa guy and he’s funny and charming and kind of reminds Mickey of Ian when they first met and yeah maybe he’s also kind of boring but he’s nice to Mickey and Mickey deserves that. They go on a date and it’s going pretty well when they run into Ian. It is instantly clear that Vespa guy is just a poor imitation of Ian, but Mickey sees this as a chance to make Ian jealous. It works and Ian ends up proposing dramatically. Mickey says no but agrees to give Ian another chance. Vespa guy just sort of leaves annoyed because it’s clear that nothing is going to happen between him and Mickey.

Episode 10- Ian is determined to win Mickey back! Things are still awkward between Ian and Mickey after Ian’s failed proposal, but Ian is determined to prove his love. The episode starts with Ian convincing Mickey to go on a date. We follow Ian and Mickey on their date around the city (we need hijinks so they are once again trying to avoid Mickey’s parole officer) and they finally start to talk about their relationship. After spending all day together, they once again end up at the dugouts. Mickey is still feeling a little unsure about their future but Ian gives a big romantic speech about how Mickey is the only person he’s ever really wanted and how lonely he was when he got out and Mickey was still in prison. Ian proposes again and makes it clear that even if Mickey says no he’s going to stick around and keep asking. He’s going to ask Mickey everyday until Mickey believes that he’s serious. He’s going to wait as long as he has to because Mickey is the love of his life and he isn’t willing to live without him. This time Mickey says yes and they go to the Alabi to celebrate their engagement.

Episode 11- Ian and Mickey start to plan their wedding. Ian is a little surprised Mickey is so invested in the process, but Mickey explains that his first wedding was horrible and he wants to make sure that his wedding to Ian is as different as possible. He’s maybe a little bit of a bridezilla but it’s fun and clear that he’s just super excited to make Ian his husband. Unfortunately Terry finds out the wedding and burns down their first venue. Mickey is devastated, and Ian is worried that the trauma will make Mickey reconsider their marriage, but it actually just makes him more determined to have the biggest gayest wedding he can.

Episode 12- Mickey and Ian get married! It’s Ian and Mickey’s wedding day and everyone is rushing to get everything ready. As Mickey is getting ready to leave for the venue, Terry shows up and they have a confrontation. Terry leaves but there’s still a chance he’ll try to do something to ruin their wedding day. The wedding goes off without a hitch and Ian takes Mickey’s last name because it’s what we DESERVE. The reception is underway when Terry makes one more apearence. This time he is run off by the Gallagher siblings before Mickey or Ian can even talk to him because Mickey is family now and the Gallagher’s take care of their own. The season ends with Ian and Mickey riding off into the sunset.

[braincoins]

Unusual Halloween Movies

Tired of Jason, Freddy, and Michael? Want something new this year? Boy, do I have some treats lined up for you! I’ve used JustWatch to list the streaming options (though these are US streaming options; I maaaaay be up for some streaming fun on Halloween...). I’ll tell you right now, this list can almost perfectly be broken into three categories: Horror-Comedy, Sci-Fi Horror, or International Horror.

American Mary -  A medical student drowning under tuition debt finds a lucrative practice when she enters the world of body modification. ngl, I remember liking this movie but it’s been a bit since I saw it, so for the CONTENT WARNINGS I’m going to straight up rip the MPAA here: Rated R for strong aberrant violent content including disturbing images, torture, a rape, sexual content, graphic nudity, language and brief drug use

Ava’s Possessions - Ever wonder what life is like once all your demons have been exorcised - literally? Now that Ava is free of the demon that once possessed her, she’s out of a job, down a few friends, and facing charges for the acts of violence her demon did. The only way to get out of trouble is to go to the demon-equivalent of AA. CONTENT WARNINGS: mostly blood and bad language; some mild sexual content 

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon - A journalism grad student interviews a young man in training to be the next slasher killer, ala Jason/Freddy/Michael. An absolute treat of a movie for anyone who loves slasher films; it’s about 3/4 mockumentary, 1/4 actual horror film when she realizes that, no, really, he’s going to go kill all those co-eds. CONTENT WARNINGS: Blood, gore, naked boobs (”Ugh. Is that REALLY necessary?” “Now, Taylor, who’s telling this story?”), sex, occasional panty shots (because, again, slasher films). 

Bubba Ho-Tep - OH MAN another one I had to go back and add in ‘cause REALLY NOW. Elvis is in a nursing home (at least, he says he’s the real Elvis) and he and JFK (who is played by Ossie Davis - who you will note is NOT white) have to fight off a resurrected mummy who sucks the souls of the living out of their assholes. Bruce Campbell stars. HOW IS THAT NOT AWESOME ENOUGH FOR YOU?! CONTENT WARNING: Um... look, I think you kinda already know what sort of content to expect given what I just told you about the story.

Bulbbul (Netflix Original) -  (Hindi Language) During the 19th century Bengali Presidency, something - or someone? - is haunting the woods around a lord’s estate, killing men in gruesome ways. The lord has left his estate in charge of his young wife, while his younger brother, who’d been away studying in London, returns to hunt down whatever is causing these mysterious deaths. CONTENT WARNINGS: child bride, blood, and what Netflix calls “sexual violence”, meaning a rape scene so graphic (despite not showing any nudity or genitalia) that it is GUARANTEED to make you uncomfortable. The movie was written and directed by a woman, so there is nothing intended to be “sexy” about this at all. If you can make it through that scene, though, there is a definite payoff for it. (Or should I say “payback”?)

Eli (Netflix Original) - A young, incredibly sick boy with a fragile immune system is brought by his parents to a clinic for an experimental treatment that may be their last hope. But all is not as it seems within the walls of this place... perhaps literally. CONTENT WARNINGS: mostly just language, a few mild jump scares. People get set on fire at one point. No biggie. 

Errementari: the Blacksmith and the Devil (Netflix Original) - (Basque Language) Based on a Basque folk tale. Eight years after the First Carlist War, a government official comes to a small, impoverished Basque town asking after the blacksmith. Everyone tries to warn him away; the blacksmith is an evil, evil man. But he is on the trail of some Carlist gold that might be in the smithy, and the prospect of the gold wins him some helpers. And while everyone is distracted by that, a young orphan girl manages to get onto the blacksmith’s property. And what she finds there, no one could have expected... CONTENT WARNINGS: I took a screenshot of Netflix’s list of warnings just because it amuses me:

[sings “One of these things is not like the others...”]

Europa Report - Look, I really can’t recommend this enough for fans of found-footage features and people who can stand slower-paced, constantly-building terror. An international mission is sent to investigate Europa, one of the moons of Jupiter. (Those of you who are fans of real-world space exploration know that Europa is considered a prime target for extraterrestrial life within our solar system.) Contact was lost with the mission for a long time, until the data streams came flooding into Earth all at once. And what they showed... CONTENT WARNINGS: Like I said: slower pace than most horror/thriller movies. It builds slow and steady. There’s really not much in the way of blood and gore, though; an excellent example of terror without resorting to buckets of red corn syrup.

Event Horizon - Hellraiser in Space? Hellraiser in Space. Except the Lamentation Configuration is a fucking SPACE SHIP. Also, props for genre-savvy cast. CONTENT WARNINGS: EYE SCREAM. Blood, gore, and, no really, THE EYE THING. Did I mention the gore and the blood? Oh, and language. And blink-and-you-miss it nudity & sex.

Grabbers - Strange creatures are attacking a small Irish coastal town and the only way to protect yourself is... to be drunk? CONTENT WARNINGS: I mean, it’s Irish and everyone’s drunk, so bad language (by American standards) is a given. That’s... really about it, unless you have a tentacle phobia.

Green Room -  An up-and-coming punk band show up to play a gig and realize too late that they’re playing at a Neo-Nazi club. And when they happen to see something they... really shouldn’t have, it becomes an all-out fight for survival. Same director as Murder Party, though this movie was made later with a much better budget. CONTENT WARNINGS: Violence, blood, gore, and yes, some dogs die because they were trained to be vicious attack dogs by Neo-Nazis. :( Also, the most important content warning of all? PATRICK STEWART PLAYS A NEO-NAZI. (You think I’m joking, but for someone who grew up with him as Jean-Luc Picard, it is downright unsettling to see, okay?)

Life - Think Alien meets Europa Report (above). The six-member crew of the International Space Station are given a sample from Mars that might contain actual extraterrestrial life.  CONTENT WARNINGS: Blood. No, let me say that again: BLOOD. Sounds of bones breaking. Alien creature entering someone’s mouth and killing them from the inside (probably through a combination of choking them/asphyxiating them on their own blood/devouring their blood? It’s not clear, it’s just UNSETTLING).

Murder Party - This is what happens when snobby art school brats try to kill someone. (Read: it doesn’t go well.) Fuckin’ bop of a Halloween song over the end credits, too. Also, at least two characters are canonically bisexual. Same director as Green Room, though this movie was made first (with a much lower budget). CONTENT WARNINGS: bad language, blood, gore, nudity, mild sexual content (the nudity is supposed to be “artistic”). The dog probably DOES die, given the circumstances, but it doesn’t happen on screen, at least? And the dog gets some pretty decent comeuppance first... Also, 1000000% accurate cat representation. 

The Perfection (Netflix Original) - A former cello virtuoso (virtuosa?) gets in touch with her former teacher and meets his new star pupil. An instant connection is formed between the two women... or is it? (Yes, there are lesbians!) CONTENT WARNINGS: oh chaos, where do I start? Bugs under the skin, hacking off body parts, blood, gore, mild sexual content, sexual abuse, and the movie itself is complete and utter MINDFUCKERY. Did you like “Tales from the Crypt” as a kid? You’ll probably dig this. 

Ravenous - With apologies to all Native Americans, but at least they did get actual Native American actors for those parts (George is played by a Pueblo actor; his sister Martha is played by an actress of Menominee and Stockbridge-Munsee descent). A soldier who won a questionable victory during the Mexican-American war is given a hero’s status and then an exile to a remote fort in the Sierra Nevadas. Not long after he arrives, a would-be settler arrives with a harrowing tale, calling for help for what few survivors there are of his wagon train. The two friendly Native Americans at the fort issue warnings that go unheeded, of course. CONTENT WARNINGS: Blood, gore, cannibalism, PTSD.

Slither - James Gunn’s 2006 Feature Movie Directorial Debut! He wrote it, too. An homage to B-movie gore flicks like you’d see at the drive-in. I am just copying and pasting the IMDB summary ‘cause I love this movie too much to be concise about it: A small town is taken over by an alien plague, turning residents into zombies and all forms of mutant monsters. (Oh, but don’t forget the nasty, slithery blood worm things!) CONTENT WARNINGS: Nasty, slithery blood worm things. GORE, BLOOD, GORE, GORE. A very uncomfortable sex scene. Michael Rooker.

They’re Watching - An American TV crew filming what is essentially “House Hunters: Eastern Europe” stumble into superstitions, folklore, and... TERROR!! MWAHAHAHAHA. No, seriously, I LOVE how it’s basically “What if some HGTV crew wound up waaaaaaaay in over their heads, in a horrible and bloody way?” CONTENT WARNINGS: Blood, gore, and NO WI-FI.

[thestuckylibrary]

Mods’ Reads: January 2020

Here’s the list of everything the Mods have read this past month!

Mod Blue

Sine Tactu by justanotherStonyfan (complete | 22,586 | M)

“Want me to help with this?” Steve says quietly, head about level with James’ stomach as he stares up at him, fingers reaching up for James’ fly, but James shakes his head.

“No,” he says, wets his lips - Steve is all skin and muscle and he’s totally naked and he’s right here and- “no, I’m.” He swallows hard. “I’m not getting naked. This is about you.”

Part 29 of Honey Honey

Propius by justanotherStonyfan (oneshot | 6,178 | E)

Steve comes home kicking snow off his shoes, although a lot of it’s gray colored, and he’s shivering. Despite that, his cheeks are bright with the cold and his smile is bright with affection, camera in hand.

“Hi!” he says on a breath, shoulders hunched to keep the cold air out of his collar, and James smiles, crosses the conversion to reach him, and grabs the trailing ends of Steve’s scarf to draw him down for a kiss hello. “Mh.”

James wrinkles his nose as Steve’s nose presses into his cheek.

“Jesus, you’re freezing,” he says, and Steve laughs softly.

“Yeah,” he says “That’s why I came back inside.”

Part 30 of Honey Honey

I Believe In Something More by cydonic (complete | 74,304 | M)

In April of 2014, two very important things happen: The Winter Soldier is prepped for a mission as part of Project Insight which never ends up happening, and Steve Rogers finds out his mother is dying.

In October of 2018, Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers meet in the Sculpture Garden at UCLA. Bucky has spent the ensuing years building a life for himself, learning that he likes to study in the sunshine and build friendships with people who just think of him as ‘that nice guy who’s really smart’, not what he used to be. Steve has tried to make it in Brooklyn, but everything reminds him of Sarah. He needs a change of scenery, and following his childhood best friend Sam Wilson over to California seems to be the way to do it.

Rare Is This Love (Keep It Covered) by histoires_eternelles, musette22 (complete | 66,773 | E)

It's 2014. Captain America has been out of the ice for three years and is trudging along, saving the world and trying to get used to living in the future. Steve thinks he knows how the rest of his life is going to pan out – a life of duty, which he chose when he signed up to be Erskine’s science experiment. But then, he meets Bucky Barnes: the out-of-this-world-gorgeous mechanic and war vet, who turns Steve’s life upside down and makes him question everything he thought he knew. Slowly, Steve comes to realize there is more to life than duty and punching Nazis. Just one problem though: how on earth does a 96-year-old virgin who only just realized he may not be entirely straight make the transition from crush to relationship? Cue healthy amounts of self-doubt, awkward flirting, pretty blushing, existential crises, emotional growth, and maybe, possibly, a sexual awakening.

darling heart, i loved you from the start (but that's no excuse for the state i'm in) by voxofthevoid (oneshot | 19,725 | T)

“I thought you’d make a terrible Nazi but turns out you’d make a terrifying one instead.”

The year is 2012. Loki has vanished with the Tesseract, and Manhattan is a blazing wreck. A very tired Steve Rogers goes home and meets another very tired Steve Rogers.

Or, the one where Steve saves the mind stone for last and decides to fuck the timeline beyond all recognition, which regrettably involves crawling delicately up Hydra's asshole and less regrettably involves showering a very confused Bucky Barnes with affection.

Kissin' by the mistletoe (Love came to stay) by obsessivereader (oneshot | 4,949  | E)

“I told you,” Steve wheezes, as he tries to catch his breath. “Didn’t I fucking tell you we'd fall if you didn't quit pushing?”

He’d laugh if he had any air left in his lungs. Instead, all he can do is stare up at Bucky as the sound of his carefree laugh winds its way around Steve’s heart. He barely even registers the cold seeping in through his jacket and jeans as he lies in the snow, attention catching instead on the snowflake clinging to Bucky’s lashes. Were Bucky’s eyes always that luminous? The crinkles around his eyes so endearing? Were his lips always that pink?

Bucky’s laugh dies away at Steve’s continued silence. A strange expression settles on his face, like he’s looking into the face of a stranger for the first time, studying and cataloging Steve’s features one by one—eyes, nose, mouth.

Based on this tweet, which has, sadly, been deleted: FUFJFJ ITS SNOWING A LOT IN NY RN AND IM WALKING HOME AND THESE GUYS ARE LIKE PUSHING EACH OTHER IN THE STREET AND ONE GUY GOES “YOU ASSHOLE STOP PUSHING ME IM GONNA FALL” AND THE OTHER GUY WAS LIKE “.... For Me?” and the other guy was like bro... no fuck you” AND THEY BOTH FELL

Part 2 of Happy Steve Bingo!

thot through the heart (and you're to blame) by Deisderium (complete | 9,899 | E)

"You look like shit," Steve says, and that breaks the spell a little because fuck you, Steve, he looks good. Steve's nostrils flare. "Is that—is that blood on your mouth?"

Oh, fuck. Bucky needs to work on not being a sloppy eater. He wipes his mouth hastily, and without thinking, licks his hand clean. Steve stares.

*

In which Bucky is a baby vampire, a disaster, out to have a good time, and hopelessly in love with his roomate; and in which Steve has a few secrets of his own.

Part 1 of food for thot

Scratched Ragged and Rubbed Raw by cheesethesecond (oneshot | 3,788 | T)

“How are you gonna sleep tonight,” Bucky asked, letting his head fall back against the wall and closing his eyes, “knowing that a guy who tried to kill you is sleeping in the next room?”

“Like a baby,” Steve said.

This Lonely Hour Before Daybreak by cheesethesecond (oneshot | 2,912 | T)

Steve knew there would be good days and bad days. That’s how this sort of thing worked.

Except sometimes, the bad days go like this.

Something Great by dragongirlG (oneshot | 1,485 | G)

The Soldier knows he is not Bucky Barnes, but he still seeks out Steve Rogers after the helicarriers fall, inexplicably craving Rogers' affection. Rogers gives it. (Basically, the Winter Soldier wants a hug. Steve gives him that and a little more.)

Based on a prompt from withinmelove: I have a love for Winter Soldier as his own person so Winter Soldier and Steve cuddling is my prompt! Maybe WS is touch starved and is really eager to be affectionate with Steve who is happy to be close and tender with him.

The Right Partner* by LeeHan (oneshot | 41,651 | E) *graphic violence

“Now, correct me if I’m wrong,” Bucky said, tapping his chin thoughtfully, “but I believe I was promised a mocha.”

When he turned to look at Steve there was laughter in his eyes and a touch of heat in his smile.

Dating a civilian was always risky. Luckily, Bucky seemed like a nice, genuine guy and Steve knew he could gently reject him with the smallest shrug and that Bucky would accept his decision easily. It was the smart thing to do.

“Don’t forget the croissant.”

—

Steve meets a beautiful man with a bright laugh on a sunny day in Italy. Captain America meets the elusive Winter Soldier moments later.

Date Bucky Barnes. Defeat the Winter Soldier. Bring down Hydra. How hard could it be?

Pedantic Affectations by fannishlove, relenafanel (complete | 15,858 | M)

Steve Rogers: khaki pants and ugly tweed wearing art history professor specializing in historical queer art (by day). Is actually Captain America, vigilante and the bane of Detective Barnes’s existence (by night).

Detective Bucky Barnes: A very clever cop who suspects something is up with Steve. Is frustrated that Captain America exists and is dedicated to finding him because he loves a good puzzle.

So, how does Steve convince Bucky that he's too boring to be Captain America? Go on a date with him.

(Steve is kind of really, really bad at this secret identity thing)

The Comfort in Certainty by justanotherStonyfan (complete | 20,554 | E)

"You were right when you said we need to talk," Steve says softly ... "Is there anything you want to say first?"

... James can't stand the suspense. If it's going to happen, if he's going to do it, James wants that bandaid ripped off now.

"Is this a breakup talk?" he says, and his wishes his voice would be stronger but he’s almost glad that it’s not.

Steve takes a deep breath in through his nose.

Part 31 of Honey Honey

Honeypot by cleo4u2, xantissa (complete | 133,204 | E)

Preconditions: One Sasha Marozow - internationally renowned assassin for hire, known as the Winter Soldier, ex-Hydra operative freelancing for the last five years; One Steve Rogers, Captain America - recently defrosted national hero and Avenger; One assassination contract; One set-up known in the intelligence community as the “honeytrap”.

Expected Result: One Winter Soldier in custody, the name of his employer attained.

Actual result: Definitely not as expected.

Part 1 of Honeypot

Give Up the Ghost* by cleo4u2, xantissa (oneshot | 19,518 | E) *graphic violence

They were happy together and the year had been good for them. They thought nothing could tear them apart. They were wrong.

Part 2 of Honeypot

i'm a believer (got a fever running through my bones) by voxofthevoid (oneshot | 16,742 | E)

Everyone knows Captain America is an alpha. His tragic romance with Howard Stark is as popular a topic for movies and academic papers as his exploits in the war. Sure, Stark never said a word, and he clearly moved on, given that Tony Stark is currently alive. But even now, people like to gossip in hushed whispers about how sad it is that Howard Stark passed away a mere two years before they found the good Captain in the ice.

Bucky gets it, alright? Alpha/omega is the norm. Matches sanctioned by god or whatever bullshit your conservative Christian sect of the day likes to ramble about. It’s the twenty-first century, and the world still runs on a maddening policy of straight until proven otherwise. Thing is, Bucky has most certainly proven otherwise and has been doing so since he was a wee alpha panting after some knothead or the other because being queer didn’t magically make him any less stupid than your average horny teenager.

Bucky’s an alpha, Bucky likes alphas, and he’d love nothing more than to climb Steve Rogers like a goddamn monkey bar.

- Steve meets Bucky on a flaming helicarrier. It’s not the most romantic first meeting, what with the Nazis and the bullet wounds, but they make it work.

the jackpot question  by biblionerd07 (series, ongoing | 16,126 | G-T)

Steve needs a ride home for Christmas. Bucky needs a passenger.

Winter Gorgon* by Quarra (complete | 74,067 | E) *graphic violence

For as long as Steve could remember, all he ever wanted to do was what was right. So when he hears about his father's old regiment being held as POW's by the Nazis, he's determined to put what Doctor Erskine gave him to good use and goes AWOL to rescue them.

But the 107th isn't all he finds there. Deep in the labs is a very unusual prisoner; one with snakes in his hair and a mask nailed to his face. Despite the man's monstrous visage, Steve can't in good conscience leave him to the enemy. That one act of mercy will change his life, the course of the war, and even the future of the world.

[mst3kproject]

623: The Amazing Transparent Man

 You know, when I think about it, it seems like a ‘transparent man’ should be a different thing from an ‘invisible man’.  An invisible man you can’t see… but there are a lot of transparent things that you can see.  Glass, water, quartz, or clear plastic are transparent, but you can still tell where they are because they bend the light that passes through them.  So shouldn’t a transparent man be more like the cloaked Predator, in that as soon as he moves you notice the distortion?  I’m just saying, that would look way cooler.

As the movie begins, some thoughtful person has arranged for bank robber Joey Faust to escape from prison.  Upon arriving at a ranch in the middle of what appears to be a nuclear wasteland, Faust learns that his benefactor is retired Major Paul Krenner, who wants to take over the world with an army of invisible soldiers.  To that end Krenner has forced his pet Nazi, Dr. Ulof, to build an invisibility ray, which he uses on Faust so the latter can steal tin cans of radioactive macguffin for him.  Faust, however, has other plans.  His invisible ass has banks to rob… if he doesn’t die of radiation poisoning first.

Like The Thing that Couldn’t Die, The Amazing Transparent Man is a one-trick movie.  All it’s got is an invisible man moving things around (and the innards of an invisible guinea pig), but it works a little better here since it never dangles anything else.  The effects aren’t nearly as fancy as Griffin’s empty clothes skipping gaily down the lane in The Invisible Man (made nearly thirty years earlier), but they do their job and I quite like how we briefly see the guinea pig’s skeleton and circulatory system.  It’s too bad they couldn’t do the same thing with Faust, which I’m guessing was because they didn’t have the money to do it in motion when he reappears in the bank robbery scene.

The minimal nature of the effects suggests that this is a film that’s supposed to be carried by its story, which is great!  Unfortunately, the story attempting to carry it is rather confused.  For starters here is, yes, another movie in which there’s nobody to root for!  With the sole exception of Maria Ulof, who never even speaks a line, every single named character in The Amazing Transparent Man is a villain or at the very least an asshole.  The result almost works, though, because they’re assholes working against each other. We have at least a basic idea of what each person wants and how they’re hoping to achieve it, and therefore we understand how and why they’re at odds.

We’ve got Krenner, who is the most explicit bad guy of the movie. He’s bitter about being discharged from the army, so he became a deranged megalomaniac with Nazis in his attic, and he’s going to show them, show them all, with his invisible army (which I have to say is slightly more practical than an army of werewolves or mutant fish-men).  He trusts nobody, and therefore bringing this plan to fruition requires keeping his associates under control, and he has things to hold over each of them. For Faust, it’s the threat of turning him in to claim the reward.  With Julian the gun-toting thug, it’s the promise of someday getting his son back. With Ulof, it’s the life of his daughter.  His Femme Fatale for Hire, Laura Madsen, he simply slaps into submission.  He’s a terrible person on every possible level and we’re glad to see him blown up at the end.

Faust isn’t much better, and one of the most important places where the movie fails is that we know less about Faust’s goals than Krenner’s, even though Faust is the point-of-view character.  Like Krenner, Faust is a bitter criminal.  He cares about nothing but money, to the point where we don’t even know what he plans to do with the money he’s going to steal – he seems to want to rob a bank just because it’s what he does.  We do understand his antagonism towards Krenner, at least: having just escaped from jail, what Faust wants most is of course freedom, while what Krenner is offering him is just a different sort of imprisonment.  Good riddance to Faust, too.

The character this movie wants us to feel sorry for is Ulof, which is really weird when you think about it because this man is a fucking war criminal. He tells us he tortured prisoners in a concentration camp and only came to regret it when he realized one of them was his wife – whom he apparently never recognized even though her only disguise was a hood.  So he doesn’t know her body and build at all?  He never heard her voice?  She never heard his and tried to find another way to communicate with him?  Where did he think his wife was while all this was going on?  I find myself entertaining the horrible thought that the daughter he so adores probably wasn’t conceived in the standard way, since she must have been born only shortly before her mother’s death… ew.

The fourth character who does much in the story is Laura, and I really can’t tell what we’re supposed to think of her.  The way Krenner and Julian treat her make her seem like a victim but there’s no backstory about how she got into this situation. She’s kind of Faust’s love interest but not really, since she mostly seems to be trying to use him to get away from Krenner – and frankly, Faust doesn’t treat her much better than Krenner does.  I get the impression that the movie doesn’t know what to do with her, and she dies at the end mostly to get her out of the way.

So we have these four players plus Julian and they all hate one another.  Laura despises Krenner and kind of wants to run off with Faust but can’t let Krenner find out she’s going to do that.  Faust’s going to squeeze every possible cent out of Krenner and Krenner resents it. Ulof wants to spring his daughter and go hide out in Argentina with old friends, and hopes Faust can help him do it. These various storylines do start to go places, what with Ulof almost tricking Faust into opening the door, and Faust taking Laura to go rob banks. Just as that starts to look like the plot, though, it gets interrupted by Faust’s radiation poisoning and everything comes to a halt.

This isn’t exactly a bad plot turn, but after the movie took the trouble to set up the relationships and conflicts between the various characters, it’s a bit out of left field to realize that the only resolution we’ll get is the isotopes blowing up as Krenner and Faust try to strangle each other.  Faust never even gets a chance to try to deal with his impending mortality before it all goes up in a mushroom cloud.  Kind of convenient that the deserts around the ranch already looked barren and lifeless, isn’t it?

Of course if we’re going to talk about the movie, we have to mention two other pieces of fiction that contributed significantly to the inspiration for it.  One of these, very obviously, is H. G. Wells’ The Invisible Man.  The main character of that story, Griffin, goes mad with power (and toxic chemicals affecting his brain) and declares himself King Invisible Man the First – he fails in part because he’s also Invisible Man the Only, and I suspect that what if he had a whole invisible army though? was part of the inspiration for The Amazing Transparent Man.  It ended up back at only one invisible man because the sweeping horror epic that question inspires was just way too expensive.

The second, equally obviously, is Faust.  There are real people whose last name is Faust, but it’s the sort of name that’s so closely associated with a particular piece of fiction that it never occurs in others except as a reference.  Having the name just there would be like having a character whose last name is Frankenstein and not doing anything with it.  So how does The Amazing Transparent Man draw on Faust?

Faust is the sordid tale of a medieval scholar who sold his soul to the devil in exchange for unlimited knowledge, magical powers, and of course, sweet, sweet pussy.  Goethe ends his play with Faust’s redemption, but the legend he drew on told how Faust’s hubris damned not only himself but everybody around him.  The obvious reading of The Amazing Transparent Man is that Krenner is Mephistopheles and Faust is… well, Faust. Actually, I don’t think the references is quite that simplistic.  Instead, I would argue that all four of the major characters here are Faust.  They have all sold their souls, and in the end the devil claims them… except the Nazi scientist, even Satan didn’t want him.

Krenner wants power and revenge and doesn't care what he has to do in order to achieve that – people are nothing but tools to him, and his plan actually relies on killing some to keep the rest of his future subjects in line.  He has taken leave of all humanity.  Faust wanted money, and had to sacrifice his own soul, in the form of his relationships with his wife and child, in order to get it – and he learned nothing.  Dr. Ulof wanted knowledge and gained it at the expense of human lives, and now that he seeks to escape his past he finds he cannot. It has followed him across the sea and now, with his identity out, it will follow him to his death.  Exactly what Laura did is a mystery but her attempts to escape and ultimate death follow the same pattern.

All this suggests that like The Beast of Hollow Mountain, The Amazing Transparent Man started off with somebody having a really good idea and thinking about it very thoroughly, but then budgetary constraints reared their ugly collective head and it all went pear-shaped.  The movie that results is bland and confused and never as interesting as it thinks it is, which is a shame.  I kind of want to see the movie they started out with.

[beevean]

People in real life: Why don’t you like Salvini? He’s great! He’s finally helping us! He’ll drive away all these dirty criminal niggers! Why is Italy’s birthrate dropping at an alarming rate (except for the immigrants who keep breeding and will destroy our culture)? MMMMMMH must be the whores who prefer work to marriage and the gays that destroy the very concept of the family!!! We should guilttrip young people into breeding even though we constantly show news about how this country (especially the South where you live) is a joke and there is no hope! We have no money and we’re a bunch of uncouth illiterate bigoted assholes and the clowns of Europe, but I don’t understand why young people are fleeing! They should preserve our noble culture! When are you having kids?? You’re selfish and useless if you don’t give us kids!! Family is the most important thing we have!!! (pls ignore the news of parents killing their children every day) You’re a young woman and therefore you can’t go out without fearing all those niggers around you!! yeah it’s sad that girl #480237409 got brutally murdered but she was fucking an immigrant and she was on drugs so she kiiiiiinda deserved it

People on Tumblr: AHUFSNLF YOU MAD STRAIGHTIE???? hahahaha not my fault if you straighties can’t understand love and fuck stupid men who will abuse you :DDDD i’m SO glad i’m a Lesbian and therefore i will experience real love unlike those poor little straight women who have to deal with the demons they call men! If you like problematic things you should slit your throat and get raped by an old man (because i care about real people ofc)!!! I’m a minor and therefore everyone should agree with me and think sex is EVIL and sexual attraction is inherently dehumanizing!! You’re a young woman and therefore you can’t go out without fearing all those men around you!! hey look a dozen news about the US and how much it sucks and how evil white people are!!!! You are a white supremacist asshole if you don’t care and reblog!!! what’s that, you like SU? It comforts you? yeah FUCK YOU YOU’RE A RACIST NAZI NO FUN ALLOWED HERE the only way you can have fun here is if you chant SONIC SAID TRANS RIGHTS every day!!

tl;dr: i’m tired and i don’t know where to go.

[vintagegeekculture]

Oh wise vintagegeekculture, might I ask your opinion on Michael Moorcock's essay "Epic Pooh"?

I am American as all-get-out. Stranger Things is practically a documentary about my rural childhood;there were a million little sense memory triggers in that series for me. Sothere is probably a cultural context to that very very English essay thatdiscusses a very very English relationship to lulling sentimentality and class and the countryside that I willfully concede that I am simply not grasping. The English seem tothink entirely in terms of debating sentimental imagery: “Mother London” vs.the “Ploughman’s Lunch” and “Little Britain.” Althought it is a serious issue,listening to British debates on Brexit often felt like hearing to the “Darmokand Jalad at Tanagra” aliens from TNG having a loud argument about who’s Momloves them more.

But…from my perspectiveas an outsider and foreigner, I think the general point Moorcock makes iscorrect: Fantasy was created by men like Tolkien and Lord Dunsany who wereviolently hostile to the modern world and so their work very studiously avoidedtalking about the modern world except in opposition to it (for instance, theonly person to push industrialization and scouring the countryside is anasshole wizard; the only person who talks like T.S. Elliot’s Londoners is the despicableSméagol). Lord Dunsany was a great writer, but seems like a thin-bloodedaristocrat, like a Brit Ashley Wilkes from GoneWith the Wind, who even in the 1970s, wrotehis stories with a quill pen and wore an ascot tie to book readings.

Moorcock is right whenhe says that fantasy often avoids reflecting the world around us, and thatbeing overly sentimental about the past serves the interest of reactionaries(note that he did not call Tolkien and Dunsany and the rest reactionaries…atleast in a way that was visible in their work – he did say that about Adams andLewis though). The most important quote in that essay is “Ideally fiction should offer us escape and force us, at least, to askquestions; it should provide a release from anxiety but give us some insightinto the causes of anxiety.” I mean, fantasy as a genre was so detachedfrom “real world” issues that when someone like Tad Williams started to includesomething as fundamental as economics into his fantasy worlds starting in the1980s, people treated him like a total genius (Which Tad Williams IS,incidentally - these days, people only really know Tad Williams, if they knowhim at all, as the inspiration for George R.R. Martin’s Game of Thrones).

One of the great themesof Moorcock’s work is the way that authoritarians use sentimental imagery ofthe past to manipulate people. If you read Epic Pooh, also read his other book,“The Dreamthief’s Daughter,” the opening third to half is set in Nazi Germany.It’s actually more helpful to understand the point of this essay to read “Dreamthief’sDaughter,” since, in the words of Francois Truffaut, “the only way to critiquea movie properly is to make another movie.” Dreamthief’s Daughter starts with a“Good German,” von Bek, who is horrified that his Germany was taken over byNazism, how they replace “self respect with a kind of strutting self-esteem.”At one point, our hero has to hide in the German countryside, and he mentionshow sinister the small storybook German towns he passes through seem, romanticized by fascists after Hitlercame to power, as they were pushed front and center as the “true Germany.”

Of all the books everwritten about the Nazis and arch-reactionaries, Moorcock gets it the most rightin “Dreamthief’s Daughter.” They were boring failsons, not supervillains.Rudolf Hess was described as the most irritating person to sit next to on thebus to a con and who believed magic and ghosts were real; von Bek said that “inmy many adventures, I showed true courage only once: in not throwing RudolfHess out of my car.” Von Bek’s comments on Hitler himself: “An evening withHitler was like an evening with an extremely boring maiden aunt.” He was alsothe first person I can think of to point out how reactionary fascists oftenhave really bad taste, too: drawing imagery from bad comic operas and Americanmovies about Rome. That last bit should be all too familiar to people whonotice how many American reactionaries love the hell out of the movie 300 (amovie I really like too, incidentally, but it’s okay to enjoy something if you understand it).

Also, “Dreamthief’sDaughter” had a great finale: imagine a flight of dragons coming out to fight theBattle of Britain.

The point, that fantasycan be infantilizing, is a good point, but Moorcock is the weirdestpossible person on the face of the earth to make it. Moorcock got famous bywriting about brooding angsty albinos who cry all the time for the benefit ofteenage heavy metal fans and dungeon masters in Reeboks. I love his stuff but that’s who he is,that’s the stuff that pays his mortgage, that’s his audience. His stuff is good but it reminds me ofthose White Wolf games in the 1990s that look silly and dated in retrospectbecause they trowel on the angst and transgression and put on airs (White Wolf,incidentally, was named after Moorcock’s greatest hero, Elric the White Wolf…andin the 1990s, White Wolf’s publishing arm dedicated itself to reprinting someof Moorcock’s less widely seen novels, a service for which I thank them verymuch). I am actually legitimately surprised that Moorcock never wrote a “sad sexy vampire” novel. God, can you imagine the kind of satire that the anarchic MAD magazine of the 50s would do of the Elric stuff? Elric screaming his soul is black at the breakfast table, while threatening to kill himself over a hangnail.

[chasholidays]

The 100: Clarke is a street medic, Bellamy punches a Nazi and some good ol' fashion anti-fascist romance ensues. (Bonus points if Clarke also punches a Nazi?) ❤️

It’s always nice, in a kind of weird way, when Clarke sees someone she knows, but doesn’t know very well, at a protest.

She likes to assume that most of the people in her life, even the passing acquaintances, are at least against the Trump administration, and that many of them are opposed enough to be taking direct action, but it’s always nice to have those feelings confirmed.

And it is, admittedly, especially nice to have those feelings confirmed with someone she is lowkey crushing on.

Not that it’s surprising, really, that Bellamy Blake is a revolutionary. He’s not white and not straight, both of which are good indicators on their own, let alone together, and he’s always struck her as the kind of person who stands up for what he believes in.

He’s also a trainer at her gym and stupidly ripped, which is probably why she becomes aware of him in the middle of a fight, punching some guy who’s trying to hassle a couple kids who don’t even seem to be involved in the whole thing, just passing through.

She doesn’t see him, specifically, right away; she’s making her way over to the altercation, trying to figure out what’s going on and if she can break it up, when she sees one guy throw a punch, and another guy punching back, and by the time she realizes that one of the guys on her side is Bellamy, it’s too late for her to do much except help get the girls out of danger.

“Hey, Blake, I’ve got the kids!” she says, sees his eyes flick over to her for just a second, just long enough to see who she is and what she’s doing before he turns his attention back to the fight.

“Thanks, doc,” he says, moving to shield them, still ready to keep fighting. The girls are probably high-school aged, wearing Hillary Clinton shirts but not, apparently, actually involved in the rally, and Clarke checks them both over while listening to the fight with one ear. It’s growing, of course; these things always do.

“What were you guys doing down here?” she asks one of the girls.

“Just walking,” she says. “We heard there was stuff happening, so we wore the shirts, but we’re just going to the movies.”

“Bullies always pick on people they think won’t fight back. They wanted to hassle someone and you guys were there. I’m sorry,” she adds.

The girl shrugs, pragmatic. “We knew it might happen. And it’s not like they did anything to us. They called us names and then your friend showed up to walk with us.”

“Do you think he’s okay?” the other girl adds. “He got hit.”

“Trust me, I’m checking on him after I check on you. But he should be fine. He’s pretty tough.”

“Will you thank him for us?” the first girl adds. “He was really nice.”

“I definitely will. Where are you guys going?”

The movie theater is in sight of where they are, but Clarke walks them anyway, just to be safe. She’s not much of a fighter, but she’s older and knows how to look intimidating enough that no one hassles them again.

Once they’re inside, she head back where she came from, planning to go check on the fight, try to find Bellamy, but he finds her first, falling into step with her.

“Cover for me? Cops broke it up, but I don’t really want to talk to them, so–”

She slides her arm into his, leans her head against his shoulder. “Couple going on a movie date?”

“Perfect. Hi, by the way. Nice to see you.”

“You too. Those girls said to thank you. How are you doing?”

“I’ve been better. Did you seriously come to a rally with a first-aid kit?”

“I worked in an ER every summer during college. I might as well use it. Did you come to punch a Nazi?”

“I’m always hoping, but it’s never actually worked out before.” He puts his face in her hair as a couple cops pass, she assumes to hide the damage she hasn’t gotten a chance on check yet. But it’s also a little bit nice, if she’s honest. She needs more cuddling in her life.

Once they’re in the clear, she holds the door open for him. “Come on, they might have a family bathroom.”

“I think they’ll think we’re trying to hook up.”

“Yeah, I like them bloody and achy.”

“Adrenaline is an aphrodisiac for some people.” He wets his lips, looking around. “There’s a chair, I can sit in a chair, right? They aren’t going to kick me out.”

“We can always buy tickets to something if they make us. Here, sit down.”

She gets him settled, facing away from the windows in case anyone is seriously trying to find him, and gets her first good look at him. His hair is always kind of messy, but it’s obviously not deliberate now, going every which way and like someone was pulling it, and his eye is already starting to blacken. There’s a little blood on his lip, but nothing too bad.

He’s also wearing a tight pansexual pride shirt that makes his arms look even larger than normal, but she probably shouldn’t think about that until she’s got him cleaned up.

“So, this was your first time punching a Nazi, right?”

“Not for lack of trying. Not that I come to these to pick a fight,” he adds. “But I know I actually can win the fight, and not everyone can.”

“Yeah. That’s why I bring the first aid kit and water bottles. I can be a warm body, and if anything bad happens, I can help out. Was anyone else fighting on our side, or just you?”

“A couple others. I think they’re fine. I was in the middle.”

“You got off pretty light.”

“You haven’t looked at my hand yet.”

She winces. “Fuck, I forgot. Split knuckles?”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure.”

“You want me to do the face first or straight to the hand?”

“I think the hand is bleeding more.”

“Okay.” She unties the flannel from around her waist and puts it on his lap, making him smile.

“I’m not sure my jeans are more worth protecting than your shirt.”

“They’re nice jeans,” she says, absent. “Jesus, Bellamy.”

“That bad?”

Her fingers trace over the jagged cuts. “You really got him in the teeth.”

“He was harassing a couple of high-school kids,” he says, gruff. “Just because they were away from the pack. He deserved to get his teeth knocked in.”

“I’m not going to argue with you. Just–sucks for your hand.”

“Worth it.”

She gets antiseptic out of her first-aid kit, starts to clean out the cuts. He winces, but doesn’t say anything. “Have you noticed how punching Nazis was completely socially acceptable right up until it started being something we thought we needed to do again?” she asks, to distract him. “They were the safest fictional targets in the world, and now that we have assholes in swastikas demonstrating in the street, suddenly everyone wants to remind us that violence isn’t the answer.”

“Depends on the question,” says Bellamy. “It’s not like I really wanted to spend 2017 worried about losing basic rights and fighting fascists, but here we are.”

“Here we are.”

He clears his throat, watching her work on his hand. “Have you had to do this a lot? Treat people?”

“It’s mostly giving them water and stuff. A lot of kids are really upset and want to do something, so they just come out here pissed and don’t bring supplies.”

His laugh is soft. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of that.”

“If I was as ripped as you, I’d be thinking more about punching people too. A good revolution uses everyone where they’re most effective. We have different skill sets.”

“Well, I appreciate yours right now. I would have just waited until the protest was over and probably gotten an infection.”

She makes a face. “Yeah, whenever you cut yourself on someone else’s body, you should clean it out right away. You don’t know where that guy’s been.”

“Thank goodness. I’ll be sure to bring my own antiseptic next time.”

Her first impulse is to suggest that they just come to the next one together, but it feels like a little much. They still aren’t really friends, just friendly acquaintances, bonding over some old-fashioned Nazi punching. She’d like to leverage the whole thing into seeing him more, but it feels a little–weird. This is more important than her romantic entanglements.

“If you’re planning to punch people you should be prepared, yeah.” She gets her gauze out and starts wrapping his fingers, which is bad only because she’s going to stop having an excuse to touch his hands soon. He has really nice hands. But they’re set now. “Okay,” she says. “You’re good.”

“Thanks. Are you going back out there? The protest isn’t over yet.”

“Yeah, definitely.”

“We should probably stick together,” he says. “In case anyone needs medical attention or an ass kicking.”

She bites her lip on her grin. “Yeah, that sounds right.”

It’s fairly uneventful after that, which Clarke can’t really bring herself to mind. They yell a lot and cheer a lot and she identifies some kids who need to sit down and take a break, and Bellamy keeps them near the counter protestors in case anyone tries to start anything else, but the police are out now and no one really wants to get arrested unless it’s absolutely necessary.

“At least you got to punch one Nazi,” she tells him as the crowd starts to disperse, and he smiles.

“Nightmares come true.”

“That’s the 2017 mood, yeah.”

“Where are you heading?”

“Home.”

“I was hoping for a couple more details. On the train?”

“Yeah.”

“Me too.”

As they walk to the station, they establish they live in the same neighborhood, which isn’t really a surprise, given that’s where the gym is, but she wasn’t sure. She doesn’t live that close to work; he might not have either.

They’re two stops away when Bellamy says, “So, uh, I feel like I owe you.”

“For what?”

He holds up his bandaged hand. “Medical attention.”

“I don’t mind. I finally got to put my first-aid skills to the test.”

His mouth twists in a smile. “I can’t tell if you’re shooting me down preemptively or not.”

“Shooting you down?”

“I’m trying to leverage protests and Nazi fighting into a dinner date. If that’s something you’d be interested in.”

“Oh, wow. Yeah I didn’t get that. You should keep going, I wasn’t trying to shoot you down. Just be nice.”

He laughs. “Awesome. Do you want to get dinner with me?”

“That would be great, yeah.”

*

The next protest that rolls around, they go together, with a backpack full of supplies, and Clarke’s the one to punch someone this time.

“Good energy,” Bellamy says, cleaning out her cut. “Not great technique. You’re lucky you didn’t break your thumb. Did no one ever teach you how to throw a punch?”

“I thought it was one of those things you learned by doing.”

He snorts. “Yeah, no. There’s definitely a right way to punch someone. We can work on it.”

“Yeah?”

“If the current administration is going to keep on making us fight Nazis, we might as well be good at it, right?”

She has to smile. “That’s the goal, yeah. You’re not great at the medical side either.”

“So we should probably stick together. We make a pretty good team.”

She leans in for a quick kiss. “Yeah. That’s what I was thinking.”

[ramrodd]

Don’t be a 2nd Amendment Ammosexual: leave your guns at home and get the jabs.

Have Democrats forgotten that many Democrats are gun owners too?

COMMENTARY:

Nobody is interested in guns at the moment, except the 2nd Amendment Ammosexuals who stormed the Capitol on January 6.

Biden has begun the transformation Reaganomics to the Green New Deal. With this money, this $1.9 trillion, Biden has already restarted the Nixon-Moynihan-Carter process for transforming the Military-Industrial Complex to the Aerospace-Entrepreneurial Matrix at the core of the 100 year trajectory of the Green New Deal.

In spite of everything they have done to obstruct JFK’s space program, Movement Conservative have failed to kill the essential engine of the global synergies wave that was created by Apollo 11.

Movement Conservatives are, collectively, Libertarians whose collective cognitive organization reflect the crypto-Nazi mental processes of William F. Buckley. The ability to accept Ayn Rand’s Virtue of Selfishness represents the basis of Metaphysical Knowledge in the Kantian sense of the catagory of knowledge. Their common political theory is John Locke’s Tory Socialism of life, liberty and property, with the emphasis on “property”. The essence of the “original intent” judicial ideology of Movement Conservatives is to restore Tory Socialism as the core value of the US Constitution.

Democratic Socialism is the defining proposition of “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” underwritten by a Unlimited Syndication of the Declaration of Independence. Yorktown provided the Signers the opportunity to arrange our common circumstances as we fashion based on this novel social philosophy.

Tory Socialism had been the law of the land since the Magna Charta stratified the native social into an economic caste system, with “property” the superior human right. This came to Youngstown as the original intent of the commercial enterprise. The Hudson Bay Company still exists and it has its hands on the balls of the Fortune 500 in the tenderest of ways. Along with Lloyds of London, the Hudson Bay Company helps maintain the health of the global economy. They do a great job in coordination with the Federal Reserve.

The Federal Reserve is a creature of Democratic Socialism, straight from the stage of Hamilton and the original intent of the Framers and Founding Fathers of Washington’s generation was to convey “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” to the legal heart of the US Constitution. And this is what Movement Conservatives want to replace with the Tory Socialism, which was abrogated by Jeffersonian Democracy.

Newt Gingrich says that ideas are important and Tory Socialism and Democratic Socialism are two ideas We, the People. have inherited from the Signers of the Declaration of Indepence. The Signers bet the ranch on the superior moral qualities of their experience of Democratic Socialism as a capitalist tool at the core of American constitutional capitalism.

And that’s what the Biden administration is focused on: defeating Covid-19 is at the leading edge of the Green New Deal. The way this vaccination program is proceeding has created growing sense of national mobilization exactly like what happened after Pearl Harbor

Covid 19 is this generations Pearl Harbor and defeating Covid-19 is Phase I of the transformation of the Green New Deal. The only thing I would do would be to shift priorities to the 18 - 35 demographic who want to party hearty by Memorial Day as Pirates and Island Girls to Jimmy Buffet’s “Cheeseburger in Paradise” for Dewey’s Beach, a Way of Life, or Bustin’ Loose and Bob Marley for the DC hip-hop crowd at Virginia Beach. That’s the most vulnerable crowd and they are the generation who will be running the Green New Deal when Humankind has established a permanent mars colony. United Nations “Starship Troopers” will be recruited from veterans of the United Nations “Blue Helmet” Peace Keepers will have had a lunar base by 2025. This is what Walt Whitman meant by “sounding our barbaric yawp across the very roof of the Universe!”

And you’re worried about your fuckng guns? I mean, if you demand America begin to look like a Baghdad or Tel Aviv Sunday afternoon with “open carry” a result of family fueds and neighborhood beefs going back before David collected 100 foreskins as a dowry. I’d carry a gun with an asshole like David running around. But our economy works best when everybody leaves their guns at home. I grew up on Army posts and the only people with guns were MPs. Off-post, any asshole with vast psychological needs can sling a gun around a super market or shopping mall.

[lovecanbesostrange]

Crisis on Earth X is a thing that really happened and I was surprised how many little things were in there that made me very happy. Of course it will always be a sour subject, because wtf did they think that literal Nazis were necessary?

I’m sure there are hundreds of posts talking about this anyway, it all started when news broke, what would happen and now seeing it... WHY? I am not against evil doppelgangers, I love the concept. Especially if they meet and we can see how paths diverge and the good twin, who is in some sort of emotional crisis, finds new strength/faith/believe/confidence. And this would’ve been so easy here.

I like the concept of evil Supergirl. But just have Earth X be a world that was conquered by Superman first. History changed blablabla and now there is this place where physical power reigns and while the few good people killed Superman, everything was worse when Supergirl arrived and took his place. Wow, is she pissed off, losing her planet and learning how humans killed her cousin (her last piece of family). And build the world from there.

It can still be a fascist regime, but it’s enough to have like some sort of stand-in Nazis. I don’t need swastikas, a fucking SS emblem on Supergirl’s chest and concentration camps complete with historical accurate stars of David and pink triangles. Fuck you!

And this evil Kara would still tie in perfectly with our Kara. Better than humans, doing whatever she wants, because she can. In “Supergirl” Kara had to deal with being worshipped and she there is this loneliness, because yes, she is not human and it has become a shield for her. And seeing such a perverted version of herself can be a great inner journey. But the whole Führer crap (lol Kara second-in-command, really????) takes away from that.

I’m somewhat “glad” they remembered that Felicity and Stein are jewish. Then again this came in handy for more revolting drama. I didn’t need to see Earth-X Felicity brought in like that. Also having the “Arbeit macht frei” sign including the upside down b felt so wrong, there is a very specific story behind it. It’s not like superhero stories can’t use this, it’s just... look, seeing Magneto visit Auschwitz means something. Marvel fucked up enough with Hydra!Steve. I don’t need a four episode crossover event of overall lighthearted superhero shows to crank the Nazi shit up to 11. Yes, they are getting punched and everybody gets a “I hate Nazis” line... but you fucking still tortured you two jewish characters and KILLED ONE OF THEM!!

Okay, so Professor Martin Stein was going. You wanted a big heroic death scene/sacrifice as a sucker punch for the end. Have this big loss. I get it. But don’t kill dear jewish Grandpa by faceless swastika wearing nazi soldiers............ PROTECT FELICITY AND STEIN HERE AT ALL COSTS!

I can’t even enjoy seeing The Ray and Earth-X Leo Snart smooching. It’s tainted, because remembering that other minorities were targeted (and having Alex and Sara exchange a glance there, when Stein explains the pink triangles)....... just FUCK YOU ALL.

And that very sweet double wedding ending... it’s spoiled a little bit. Because I do remember the Ronnie/Caitlin wedding, WITH STEIN OFFICIATING! Btw thank you for every moment Stein and Caitlin had. Those were amazing. And that you mentioned that wedding. (Also Caitlin clearifying that she helped with that serum and it isn’t just Cisco and Harry who do the science thing... even though FUCK YOU again, because taking it was so horrible in the end.)

Let all the doppelgangers be super-assholes, let them be villains who out-evil all the main villains. Let Eobard look like the least threatening of them all somehow. Let them kill and conquer and oppress. But you don’t need to put real life monstrosities in there for that.

Okay, okay, so that overshadows everything, but if I step back and look at this as a all-the-superheroes-meet-and-fight-and-save-each-other crossover event. It worked very well. Definitely better than last year (where Kara’s presence was not necessary, guess that’s why she was so prominent this time?) and I liked how everybody could pitch in. And getting some nice personal scenes, before and during the crisis.

I’m very much okay that Central City and “The Flash” family are like the anchor to all of this. “Arrow” was first, sure, but it’s too doom and gloom all the time. Star LABS is a great base of operations and who wouldn’t love Barry and Iris? Sara started out on “Arrow” and thank you, that she always keeps a special connection to Ollie. And Ray was in Star City first as well. Yet somehow the Legends work better in connection to “The Flash” and metahumans and all.

Alex having a little panic attack, because she had her first one night stand was somewhat cute. And I guess there’s no better person to share this with than Sara. XD And Kara cheering her on was hilarious. Yay, sorry you two had a vacation in hell there... tbh if this team needed a leader, I still think Alex would be better qualified than Oliver. Except it turned out to be about Kara and with her sister in danger all rational thought went bye-bye. We are in S6 of “Arrow” and Ollie pulls the same bs as always and I still don’t buy into him as a leader. And sorry, but Sara is the one I want in my corner when shit hits the fan, but the leading aspect... Alex is the best trained for this (as long as J’onn isn’t around), but the biggest handicap for her is not knowing these people yet. And the writers love putting Ollie front and center (on fucking both sides).

I have had a lot of ups and downs with my liking of Felicity (mainly due to rubbish writing for unnecessary drama), but she got to put her best foot forth. OMG when she stood in front of helpless Kara, bodyshielding her. PRAISE! Teaming up with Iris was really cool.

Speaking of cool, I love you, Killer Frost. :3 a) I’m pissed Führer!Ollie didn’t lose his arm to her power, she was freezing him, come on! b) Can she team up with The Ray? Because that money shot with the whole team for the last fight they gave off this Firestar/Iceman vibe. Or c) let her hang out with Amaya and Zari, that was a great girl power moment.

Look, I don’t care too much about the plot. I’m okay with “let’s conquer another earth, and we choose the one day where the most superheroes are grouped up, because we are super confident we can take them; and then we take the heart of one for a transplant”. The most important part about a crossover like this to me are the character moments. (Same goes for event comics, where writers still believe anybody gives a rat’s ass about a convuluted plot with twists they pulled out of their ass. NO WE DON’T!) Know what had me clapping with joy? The caterer at the wedding, don’t try to tell me that was anybody but the daughter of Barry and Iris from the future. That is exciting!

The only other plot device I want to UGH about was the use of Red Tornado. Loved seeing General Schott as the resistance leader. And you know what, I understand why he didn’t want to give them time in the first place. But then he does, but oh no, he orders the strike earlier anyway and suddenly Flash and Ray have to fight the weapon that would help weaken the evil that destroys this Earth. Okay, so evil Oliver and Kara die anyway and Earth-X Felicity was just send off with a gun and will inspire hope I guess... but still... the Crisis on Earth-X is not totally over.

I could go on and on. Even with some nice parts. But again, fuck you for making me cry like that. EVERYBODY PLEASE HUG JEFFERSON SOME MORE!

[knightofbalance-13]

http://dudeblade.tumblr.com/post/166306713456/maggyfall-dudeblade-maggyfall-dudeblade

Heh, even you try apologizing, you still look fucking obnoxious.

Baseless statements. Right. Like the fact that Jaune had more lines that Yang or Weiss was nothing more than a lie. The fact that there are people who are still upset over Pyrrha’s death has no base.

A. OP outright says “This, of course, isn’t a perfect way to measure how much dialogue a  character has. Shorter lines such as Weiss saying “Hey!” end up counting the same as a longer lines from Ruby.” So your point there is in fact a lie by omission.

B. Yeah...said person si also a manipulator and tried silencing me whne I speak out against him then faked being suicidal then tried to use it to enforce an echo chamber. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t count. Meanwhile, said reviews of Volume 3 have shown that people agree it was the best so far and most people enjoyed Volume 4 (https://fullmetalnarcissist.com/2017/06/24/my-review-of-rwby-volume-4/)

So you still have no base in saying your universal statements as fact when you are just a very loud minority

Let me break it down for you: Nobody is asking Miles to kill himself. They’re just asking when he’s going to die or leave.

I’ll address this all later. I will say that telling someone to kill themselves and asking when they are gonna die are two different things. One is more frontal and direct while the other is more passive aggressive. It really depends on the person which is worse.

Next up, “Properly write minorities.” Look, Miles is the HEAD WRITER. He has more power than Kerry. If someone has that link to the Buzzfeed interview where it was stated that Miles overstepped Kerry about the whole “Silver Eyes” thing, I’d appreciate it.

Which means you have no proof and considering your shown bias against Miles here: No one is gonna believe you. Next!

Also, can you re-word that whole “Trying desperately to get her not to fight Phyrrah” thing? I don’t know what you’re talking about. Are you talking about how he failed to even TRY to help Ruby when she was about to be attacked by Tyrian when she was cornered? Y’know, after he had just complained about “Being tired of losing people.”? Look, Jaune is allowed to mourn Pyrrha, but the fact that he’s the ONLY one mourning her is just annoying.

A. Help Ruby. Against the Scorpion Fanaus. One of Salem’s Elite. That through thrashed RNJR not ten minutes ago. While beig several feet away. Here’s a simulation of such an event: https://youtu.be/Up6o9r92PPk?t=10m37s

B. Ah yes because Jaune is never allowed to complain about losing the one person who believed in him after seeing some hope that they’ll make it to mistral while watching a live operson die in front of them. Because Jaune must be a sociopath.

C. Um...Volume 4, Episode 2. Volume 4 episode 11. Also: Ruby barely knew Pyrrha, Renand Nora were far off from her when she died and had bigger problems and Pyrrha just kind of denied him any chance of not getting suvivor’s guilt.

Yeah, wanna explain to me how your argument is valid again?

- Up until we only saw just Jaune mourning Pyrrha, Pyrrha’s death was like Schrodinger’s Cat. She wasn’t killed for manpain until we only saw Jaune bemoaning he loss of life. And remember how Ozpin said to Call Glynda? Why did Jaune call Weiss instead? If he really wanted to help, he should’ve followed his teacher’s instructions.

Except Ruby showed Trama at Pyrrha’s death first in Episode 2 so Pyrrha would be “woman-pain.” Also: Thanks for showing that you think no male characters should be allowed to mourn detah at all lest it be “man pain”: Guess if Qrow or Taiyang, the two teammates of SUmmer who actually cared about her, mourned it’d be man pain but if sociopathic bitch Raven did its suddenly fine huh? Get your msiandric ass out of here.

Yeah I do...I also remember he told PYRRHA that, not Jaune. In fact, Jaune was recovering from Cinder whooping his ass. (https://youtu.be/pT1XiUbJu_Y?t=15m28s) So...How you gonna twist that about being Jaune’s fault?

Look, Jaune acts as if Qrow was the entire reason why Pyrrha got into that pod. The narrative is set up as if we were supposed to side with Jaune, but it gets muddled when we, the audience, are more aware that it was Ozpin that had a bigger influence of pushing Pyrrha into the pod than Qrow. So no. Our criticism of Jaune isn’t baseless. Unlike your baseless claims that that one asshole is the voice of the entire rwde tag.

And Qrow was one of the people who gave Pyrrha, a person who is selfless to a fault (literally, its a character flaw of hers), a decision that could destroy the world. Playing on one’s psychological flaws is basically the same as holding a gun to their head: You don’t really have a choice at that point.

And if you were to pay attention to the narrative you’d notice two things: A. Jaune didn’t know that. he was onbly around for the parts where a girl died and Pyrrha screaming and Pyrrha rocketing to her death. And B. JAUNE WAS ALSO WRONG! Just because Qrow was getting called out doesn’t mean Jaune was right. The narrative portrayed him as going too far and being overly hostile as no one backed him up. That’s just the narrative you call canon in your head.

Not that any of this matters: You’re a sexist towards and a racist towards white people Dudeblade with an admitted bias against Jaune also: Your opinion is worthless here.

I’m ware I fucked up in that regard. I know that I shouldn’t have typed it. But in my honest opinion, I want Miles fired. He writes so shittily, that I have ZERO faith in his ability to write anything that doesn’t revolve around his precious pet Jaune at all well.

Also, I wasn’t thinking straight. All I saw was someone basically claiming that the RWDE tag is a hivemind and I retaliated

Wanna know what’s missing here?

A fucking apology. 

Dudeblade admitted he was wrong but then completely missed the important part of actually saying “I’m sorry miles for defending your sucide baiting” to instead JUSTIFY his opinion without any more admission on being wrong to show he still knows what he was doing is wrong.

So considering your bias against Jaune, against Miles, against men and against white people: no dice here Dudeblade.

I don’t. That’s why I call out Knight-of-I-defend-nazis-and-am-a-pedophile-apologist all the time. I’m not deleting it though, I’m aware that it will stay up forever in the internet archives and that I’ll have to deal with it at every turn until I do something equally fucked up that will draw attention from it. I’ll live with what I said.

A. that's a lie and your own link proves that.

And more importantly, B. STILL NO APOLOGY. You talk about how you take responsibility for your actions and lord over my so-called “suicide baiting” and yet you don’t say a single word of apology and immediately, as in: in the same fucking breath, go back to your previous attitude.

So good fucking job: You just proved that you should be ejected as far away from RWBY as possible.